Can Christians Elope in New Zealand?

Hi there, I’m Chaznel, a New Zealand Elopement Photographer who helps travel loving couples elope in Aotearoa New Zealand with an authentic kiwi experience. I’m also a Christian and have been all my life. One of the largest pillars of my elopement photography business is basing every decision I make on my faith and belief in Jesus Christ. One of these decisions is to include chats around Christians and elopements and why we can or can't elope as believers.

Through my 4+ years of photographing elopements in the South Island of New Zealand I've had many faith converstations with couples. And recently I’ve been in deeper chats with Christians about eloping and what that looks like for us as believers and the stigma around needing to be married in front of the church and sometimes even in a church building. There's many questions around what the Bible says about eloping too so in this blog I'm simply going to share my personal opinion on the topic.

My hope is that you feel encouraged and informed through this post to make your decision on whether eloping is the right decision for you.

So let's talk about whether Christians can elope in New Zealand...

What does the Bible say:

Ever noticed that while reading about marriages in the Bible it never talks about a a ceremony specifically? Interestingly, every time there is a marriage it is simply the act of becoming one, even Adam and Eve didn’t have a ceremony. 

In our Christian culture there is a huge stigma around getting married in a “Church Building” and being married by a pastor because that is the only way acceptable to God, and if you wholeheartedly believe that then that’s absolutely your right to do so, because we must also stay true to our personal convictions and trust in the guidance from God in our private journeys. But I believe that God made everything and therefore, I don’t believe that getting married in a building is the only right way.

Imagine getting married next to a flowing river or by a gorgeous alpine blue lake surrounded by the wondrous songs of God’s creation as you share your vows with the one who you’ll be spending the rest of eternity with. How much more of a connection to God and His creation will you have when it’s spent making those lifelong commitments in His wonderful handiwork. 

In saying this, I think both ways of eloping are valid and have a place in society, but it all comes back to personal preference and conviction. There isn’t a written rule anywhere that tells you whether you can or cannot elope inside or outside, in a church or in a field. As long as you are getting married for the right reasons and understanding the lifelong commitment that you are making then you’re good to go! As Christians we need to fully understand the sacredness of marriage and the journey we choose to take part in and this will always remain the biggest choice in whether we get married or not.

Do I have to have a big wedding as a Christian or can I elope?

Traditionally Christian marriages have been a huge celebration, some even including their whole congregation at their wedding. There is nothing wrong with having everyone there to celebrate with you, but if that is sounding like a wave of overwhelm then why do it? Why pressure yourself to host an 'event' that doesn't feel true to you and the relationship you're building.

My honest opinion on the matter is that you can elope and share that moment with your nearest and dearest, keeping your vows intimate. It doesn’t mean you can’t have a party later on if you want, it just means that that commitment that you are making is kept private, because marriage is a private thing, it doesn’t need to be blasted to the world. 

The Bible never talks about the fact that it must be a large celebration, it never writes it as a rule that we must follow, so why are we fretting about the fact that if we don’t then God won’t be happy with us, since when did the people around us make the rules around marriage. Marriage has always been a sacred covenant between two people who choose to become one. And that is the only thing that God is worried about on the matter. Husband and Wife, respecting each other and staying committed to each other without wavering. 

To sum it up, my opinion on Christian Eloping is this; you can get married wherever and however you like as long as your intentions are right and you understand the commitment you are making. You don’t need to be in a flashy church for it to be approved by God, because we are the body of Christ, not the building. The church building is just a man made place of worship, never intended to be the only place that God is present or the only place where you can receive blessing. Jesus met with people under trees and connected there, so why are we limited to buildings? 

I value keeping God at the centre of everything that I do and so with this in mind if you choose that eloping in New Zealand is the right choice for you and your fiancé then I will be right there with you helping you plan the most epic adventure exploring the beautiful creation of God. Let’s start planning!